“If only COVID-19 hadn’t happened, my life would be so much better”

Many people will forever identify COVID-19 as the event that screwed up their entire life, forever.

Many businesses will go under. Many people will have a hard time making their mortgage payments once unemployment runs out, or didn’t qualify for unemployment and are already struggling. Many people have lost loved ones. Many careers will forever look different.

Many people will forever blame the government for shutting the economy down and screwing them over.

Many people will forever blame circumstances that were out of their control.

But here’s some potentially triggering news…

Victim mentality is a choice.

You can either choose to live like the hard hits make you weaker,

Or you can choose to live like the hard hits make you stronger.

If you are triggered by this right now, I invite you to see if you notice yourself saying things like this:

“If only ____ hadn’t happened, my life would be so much better”

“Why do the worst things always happen to me?”

“Of course this would happen to me, I have the worst luck in life”

“If only they hadn’t done this to me”

“The reason I will never be a good person is because of all the trauma I experienced as a child.”

“This person fucked up my life forever”

“I will never be right in the head, I’ve had too many horrible things happen to me.”

Do you think Nelson Mandela or Ghandi were defeated from all the twisted events in their life?

Strife makes you stronger, if you choose to let it.

Sometimes too much ease without gratitude leads to a lack of true perspective. Many of those in my generation have had a relatively ease-ful, struggle-free life.

We haven’t experienced any of the World Wars. We haven’t experienced genocide first-hand. We haven’t experienced the Great Depression.

We cannot control what happens to us, but we can complete control over our reaction.

𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐜𝐤𝐬 𝐮𝐬 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧, 𝐢𝐭’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐮𝐥𝐭, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐛𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲.

It’s our responsibility to pick ourselves back up, to respond pro-actively instead of reactively.

Say somebody T-bones you in a car accident.

Was it your fault? No.

Is it still your responsibility?

Is it your responsibility to get yourself checked out at the hospital and take the necessary steps towards healing? Is it your responsibility to communicate with insurance? Is it your responsibility to get your car fixed/get a new car?

It’s not your fault when shitty things happen to you, but it is your responsibility to seek healing, to fortify your mind further, to allow yourself to feel the feelings that come up and shift them, rather than dwell.

Some may disagree with me, and that’s ok.

𝐈 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐮𝐬, 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐮𝐬.

Was this thought provoking for you? Let me know below.

-Coral Lee