Imagine there’s a piece of property with all the things you’ve ever wanted — a pond, a river running through it, space for a garden and animals, a gorgeous view.

And on the property is a dark, dingy, outdated house.

If you were to build the house of your dreams on that property, you would first have to tear down the old house.

Out comes the wrecking ball.

Now, imagine if your only perspective was what’s going on inside the old house while it’s being demolished.

You would see:




a breakdown of everything you’ve ever known as…

I’ve been taking the time to have open eyes and ears to all that is going on right now pertaining to racial inequality and the cases of George Floyd, Ahmaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor, David McAtee, and Tony McDade, and others.

I’ve been listening, absorbing, sharing perspectives of POC.

I understand that the lens that I’ve been looking at life through as a white woman is starkly different than that of a black man. I see white privilege, I see the tendrils of systemic racism that still exist in our country.

Here’s something that is extremely prevalent in my mind.


Let’s be honest, jealousy is the most unsexy emotion that your partner can throw at you, and I rarely see it do anything besides drive beautiful relationships into painful turmoil. My husband and I have been together for ten years, and throughout that time, we have had many many conversations about trust and jealousy.

Even more so, I get other women asking how I avoid feelings of jealousy. I get this question ALL THE TIME.

First off, my man loves hard. He loves everybody close in his life hard and steadfast. He also is a flirt. And so am I…

I remember my college counselor once taking a piece of paper and drawing a timeline for me illustrating how many years of our lives are our “college years” and how many years are our “career years”.

He told me,

“Be deliberate about what career you invest time and money in, even if you have to take extra years to figure it out. Just make sure you are fulfilled by your career years, because that is your life.”

His illustration looked a little bit like this.

Many people will forever identify COVID-19 as the event that screwed up their entire life, forever.

Many businesses will go under. Many people will have a hard time making their mortgage payments once unemployment runs out, or didn’t qualify for unemployment and are already struggling. Many people have lost loved ones. Many careers will forever look different.

Many people will forever blame the government for shutting the economy down and screwing them over.

Many people will forever blame circumstances that were out of their control.

But here’s some potentially triggering news…

Victim mentality is a choice.

You can either choose to live like the hard hits make you weaker,

Or you can choose to live like…

I talk a lot about 𝙨𝙝𝙤𝙧𝙩 𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙢 𝙨𝙖𝙘𝙧𝙞𝙛𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙡𝙤𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙢 𝙧𝙚𝙨𝙪𝙡𝙩𝙨.

Semi “ra ra” stuff about buckling down and building your life from the ground up, staying out of victim mindset and putting on your boxing gloves to keep your mindset straight.

But what about short term results for long term sacrifice?

𝙏𝙝𝙖𝙩’𝙨 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙗𝙚𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙧𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙪𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙞𝙣𝙙𝙪𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙮 𝙛𝙚𝙡𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙢𝙚.

Good money in the short term.

Tolerable work,

fun shifts,

the time flies,

often followed by fun booze and drug-induced adventures.

But there were no long term soul-fire, legacy-building vibes in that industry for me.

I had…

Rewind 5 years ago

I didn’t share much online besides a few uncaptioned pictures of my adventures… living in Hawaii, fishing adventures in Alaska, Santa Cruz sunsets.

I didn’t share my heart. I didn’t share my struggles. I was too scared to share my opinions.

I would open up on other people’s posts, but never my own.

As a result, people thought I lived this paradise of a life — because the only things that felt easy to share were the highlight reels.

My life has always has been a form of paradise.

…I don’t settle for less.

But that…

𝕋𝕙𝕠𝕤𝕖 𝕤𝕒𝕞𝕖 𝕤𝕥𝕠𝕔𝕜𝕤 𝕒𝕣𝕖 𝕟𝕠𝕨 𝕨𝕠𝕣𝕥𝕙 𝟚𝟘% 𝕝𝕖𝕤𝕤 𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕟 𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕪 𝕕𝕚𝕕 𝕨𝕙𝕖𝕟 𝕀 𝕤𝕠𝕝𝕕 𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕞.

I sold Netflix stocks that I’d had in the market since I graduated high school, and while it wasn’t a huge chunk of money to start with, they had definitely appreciated as Netflix has turned into a megabrand in these last 17 years.

Some thought I was crazy for pulling money out of such a valuable stock at that time.

I knew that I would have more autonomy over what that chunk of money could create for me inside my own business than I could…

𝙽𝚘 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚋𝚕𝚎𝚖 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝚋𝚎 𝚜𝚘𝚕𝚟𝚎𝚍 𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚖 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚊𝚖𝚎 𝚕𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚕 𝚘𝚏 𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚌𝚒𝚘𝚞𝚜𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚒𝚝.

-𝙰𝚕𝚋𝚎𝚛𝚝 𝙴𝚒𝚗𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚒𝚗

This coronavirus quarantine is forcing many of us to face “problems” like we never have before.

Problems in how we feel our world/governments operate.

Problems in how we view our economic future.

Problems in our health care systems.

Problems in our marriages, or relationships with our kids, friends, family members.

Things that we were too busy before to truly face, are now staring us in the face.

We have problems to solve — as a collective, and individually.

So what’s the silver lining??


Some considerations to make when your wife approaches you about investing in herself.

I know you think you are keeping her safe, saving her from “scams”, “pyramid schemes” and “rip-off coaches”. It is your job to keep her safe, right?

My husband gave me some true raised eyebrows after I hired my first private coach. I don’t even think I told him exactly how much I was paying for it until I was a few months in…and he was flabbergasted.

I used the rest of my existing credit card limit (other 4 cards were maxxed out) for the first payment…

Coral Lee

The Content Creatrix. I help women structure their online businesses so they can stop trading time for money

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store